Enjoy Your Weekend As Much As You Earned It

I got to hang out with most of the guys I went out with last weekend, and I'm grateful to have a fun group of locals who will let a farang girl join them for long nights of dancing and practicing Thai. Someone said, "Hey Mia, I think you're the only farang in this room." He was right. The photo is kind of like where's Waldo, but instead of Waldo, it's where's the white girl? This is a pretty popular place to be on a Friday night, and I don't doubt that some of the people there may be my students. I'll find out on Monday. If any one of my students mentions that they saw me at the bar, I'll say I have a twin sister and her name is Mia too. (If the Fat twins can pull it off, why can't I?)

The best thing about this particular place is the music. Peppered in with the Thai hip hop songs and Thai boy band love song remixes are some old classics that the crowd goes crazy over. Aqua, Barbie Girl. I admit I had fun dancing to this one, because I didn't have to worry about being too cool to enjoy it. Yep, it's socially acceptable to get excited when an Aqua track comes on. Another one: Pretty Fly for a White Guy, by a band I don't remember the name of. Even the boys love singing "give it to me baby uh huh uh huh." And they love love love reggatone. (Adam...)

I love talking to these guys; they crack me up. One of them said I look like Sandra Bullock so they would yell Sandla! Sandla! instead of my name for the rest of the night. They are lots of fun, but it's tough to keep up with them. I thought I liked to stay out late...they put me to shame.

Saturday night I went to a party at a fellow Ajaan's home. Her home is beautiful and has more space than she knows what to do with. Aj. Wongpet picked me up early and I made garlic bread and helped prepare some other snacks. She had so. much. food. Then when the others showed up, everyone brought a dish to share. The table was about 20 feet long and silly me, thinking that we would sit at this table to eat dinner. No. There was not enough room to eat because it was completely covered with Thai dishes and salads and (a bucket of KFC?). We sat on bamboo mats on the floor, only to get up for more food. There were even a group of women sitting in a corner with mortars and pestals grinding up veggies and peanuts to make fresh som tom. There were baskets of exotic fruits, and I now have two new favorites that I will be picking up on my next market trip.

I was pleasantly surprised to learn that the head honcho dean at CMU is a St. Olaf alum. He is a Thai native, and was telling me things about Northfield that even I didn't know. (You can see the bullet hole on the side of the Northfield Bank where the Jesse James Gang was caught.) It was like a little taste of home all the way on the other side of the world. He is a great person to know around campus, and I will be a part of the ceremony this fall to celebrate a 40 year partnership between CMU and St. Olaf. I am very excited.

The food was delicious, and the company was fantastic. There was even a new teacher who showed up tonight who just arrived from New York. As in he graduated college two days ago, caught a flight and was picked up from the Chiang Mai airport and brought straight to this party where the poor guy was given too much food and countless new faces to learn when all he wanted was a shower and a bed. He starts on Monday.

The last neat thing of the night was on the drive home I saw these bright lights that seemed to trail up to the sky. I thought they may have been lights on the mountain, but once I realized they were nowhere near the mountain, I asked my friend and she explained that they are floating lanterns. They were bright gold and almost looked like an eerie constellation. To get an idea of what these are, check out these photos: http://www.chiangmainews.com/gallery/?scid=7

I only saw a few dozen of these, but it was so exciting that I can't wait for the festival when there are thousands. They just let these lanterns float into the sky any time they have something to celebrate. I'm living in a beautiful place.

Textbook Excerpt

I've already shared this gem with a couple of you, and the rest I hope get a laugh out of it. I got many many laughs out of it. To the point of tears. Last night I was reading through the student's textbook to prepare for class the next day and I came across an article they had to read for an in-class activity. I am going to share my favorite portion of this article with you:

Alli has some very entertaining side effects. The drug can cause explosive oily stools to involuntarily eject from your bowels. While that may sound like fun if you're at a frat party, it's certainly not an enjoyable experience when commuting, driving, or hanging out at the office. The manufacturer of Alli actually recommends that consumers "carry an extra pair of pants" with them at all times, just in case the side effects kick in. Why not just wear diapers?

Yes. This is the type of material my students read in class. How is this helpful to their language skills, you ask? Well, I think it's important to learn vital vocabulary like 'explosive' and 'enjoyable' and what it means to 'carry an extra pair of pants.' The reference about a frat party? I have nothing to say about that, and yet I have so many questions for the author of this masterpiece. What kind of frat parties he went to, for example.

I was going to title this blog "Explosive Oily Stools" but I got the feeling that you wouldn't even begin to read this because you might think that I ate some bad curry and decided to write about it.

The absolute best part is that when the students read it aloud in class today (I had to do this activity with three different classes, back to back), I was biting my lip to the point of bleeding trying my very best to keep my laughter tumbling in my lower belly and not let it escape to my throat and it didn't phase them a bit. Not one bit. It was magical.

Fat and Fat

Today in class I had about twice as many students than the first day. Maybe it's not cool to show up on the first day of class? I think it's cool, especially when I have to review everything I already went over on the first day. It's ok. The students who were there probably didn't understand me the first time around anyway. Now that I had a full class of mostly new students, I asked them to go around again and tell me their nicknames. (This was mostly for my own amusement. Not like I'd remember them all.)

So about half-way through, one of the young ladies stands and says "My name is Fat." I smile and say ok. The next young lady stands up and says "My name is Fat too!" I think to myself, oh my goodness, they are playing a sick joke on me. I look back and forth between these girls and I realize that they look extremely similar. They then confirm my worst nightmare. "We are twins!" Twin sisters. Fat and Fat. First of all they're not even fat. How they came up with these names is a question I'll have to ask at another time. My main concern is how in this crazy ironic world am I going to tell these two apart? My next question is why, why do they both have to have the same name? I'm thinking to myself, maybe I should give them slightly different nicknames for class so I can distinguish between the two. Fatty and Fatso? I am laughing out loud as I write this. "Fatty, please be quiet and let Fatso speak." Oh man. I would bust a gut.

The remainder of class went by fairly quickly. Maybe because I was stressing about the Fat sisters. In any case, I paced myself well throughout the remainder of class and walked across campus to my office. I always get a little kick from the students wai-ing me in passing. A wai is a special kind of bow that you do to show respect. You put your hands in a prayer pose under your nose and bow your head. Random students do this to me as I walk along the sidewalk. I have to admit, I kind of like it. I give some friendly wai's to my fellow Ajaans, especially the older Thai ones. They appreciate it.

Speaking of the other Thai ajaans, I was stopped the other day by an Ajaan in my department and she just invited me to a party at her house on Saturday. Her daughter Weerin also works in the English department, and I had coffee with Weerin the day prior. We started talking for a bit and she explained how her house is very big and empty and she wants to have a party for the teachers in the department, especially the new ones. She then said she can pick me up since she lives farther away from the campus. She would need to pick me up early so she has time to prepare. I offered to help her make pizzas and salad and garlic bread for the party, and she was delighted. She invited me to stay over for the night if I wanted to. It's amazing how the Thai open up their homes to new friends. We exchanged cell phone numbers and I agreed to be ready at 4pm on Saturday to catch a ride from her and help her make food. My favorite part of the whole conversation was her final question: "So, what's your name?"

Rainy Season

Yes, it's the rainy season. It may sound dreary and dull, but it's not. I had the day off today and you could feel a storm a brewin'. I got out for my morning run before the rain hit and because it felt much cooler, I actually made it all the way to campus and back. Still humid enough to choke someone. It's so nice to have an entire day with no agenda. Nothing that needs to be done, no plans to keep with anyone, just a day to relax with the rain. I've definitely unbusied myself lately. In the states I was always go go go. Work here, errands there, out for nights with friends in spare moments. With all the traveling in the first couple weeks here I was in hyperspeed. I've slowed down. I've forced myself to be happy doing nothing. I used to not be able to sit still; antsy in the pantsy.

Since I don't own an umbrella yet (which is absurd the amount of rain that's fallen, why? I don't know), I decided to stay in and enjoy. You can definitely learn a lot about yourself on a day like today. Having nothing to do, what do you do? I like chores. (Mom is going to flip a lid when she reads this). Yeah, that's right. I love cleaning. I cleaned all my clothes, cleaned my dishes and vases, cleaned my bathroom, cleaned my floors, the windows, the sinks. Years ago in the age of chores, I would kick and scream. I hated when someone told me to do them. Now no one is telling me anything (and frankly, it's not even that dirty, so it wasn't like anything had to be done). I encourage you to have a day to do nothing and see what happens, especially while traveling. We're so trained to go! do! experience! while traveling, so we try to cram everything into a tiny morsel of time. The whole idea of travel is to remove yourself from the familiar. So do that. Remove yourself from the familiar hustle and bustle. Even if you are not traveling. See what happens. If you're at all like me, you'll feel like a lunatic at first, but peace will come later - I promise.

Besides doing all the chores that according to my mom were 10 years too late, I was able to read a good book. This is why I love my apartment: there is a portion of the lobby that is an elevated hard wood floor, so it's appropriate to take your shoes off before stepping up. On this special space are chaise lounges surrounded by ceiling to floor windows that open like door hinges. They are all open and a hot breeze circulates around, a garden right outside. It was hard to focus on the book itself because the rest of my surroundings were so enjoyable. My friendly apartment staff wanted me to feel extra comfortable so they winked at me from the front desk and started playing music throughout the lobby's sound system. This was really kind of them. Why Kenny G, though? Really. They must have been able to sense my upper lip curling up because a few moments later they started a Toni Braxton track. It's the thought that counts I guess. I tried to block out the pop music and just listen to the rain.

The rain here is different, I swear. It can rain with the sun still shining, and it's such a welcome change from the heat. Pouring unexpectedly, and sometimes exactly right on cue. Sultry and sexy rain. Two stolen adjectives, yet still adequately descriptive. It's the kind of rain that needs no soundtrack.

More Classes, More Humor

This is so awesome. I am officially in love with my life. I know people say they love their life, but has anyone you met said they are 'in love' with their life? If it's possible, I am. A big big reason is my job. I wish that I could blog throughout the day about all the funny things that happen, but frankly, that would be rude to the students. I want to laugh too, but that would be even more rude. So yesterday was just a teeny dose. I taught one class yesterday. Today I taught four. One in the morning, then I hold office hours for awhile, then I teach another class. I have about a half hour to eat lunch, then I teach two more classes back to back. I'm done by 4pm.

By the end of the day my voice is just about gone and my hands are so caked in chalk and I've sweat out a tenth of my body weight and my cheeks hurt from smiling and it's absolutely awesome. To start from the beginning, I had a hard time again finding a red truck taxi to agree to drive me to CMU. The third one that stopped I recognized from yesterday and he shook his head again. I know he remembered me. Here is the best part - there was a sign on the window that said CMU. What's that about? If I see him tomorrow I'll ask him about it.

I love the part of class where the students come in and they haven't heard me speak yet. They get to class early and I just do my thing getting ready for class and just as it's the top of the hour I can tell they are anxious to hear me say something as they stare in silence. It's a little bit of a rush to have their undivided attention. I say good morning and they repeat it. I say, "My name is Ajaarn Mia" and they repeat my name in unison. I say, "You can call me Ajaarn Mia" and they repeat that again. I have a choir! Or a classroom full of robots!

I then ask them to introduce themselves to me. Let's talk about nicknames, because the Thai are absolutely brilliant in choosing their nicknames. They have names like Surangkhana and Narongchai and Kanockran. There is no way I'd be able to learn them all. They choose nicknames that they go by from a very young age. They choose English words for their nicknames. Not English names. Regular words. Words like Eye, or Nice, or Cloud. I have a Batman in one of my classes. I have a Pooh in another class. It's amazing. When the first student said her name is Nice, I almost stopped her and asked her what her 'nice name' was.

I speak too fast in class. I try to slow down and I try to repeat the same phrase in different ways so they are able to (maybe) understand the second or third time around. A couple of times I spoke at my normal pace on purpose just to see their faces. That's mean, I know. When I ask them questions I get no response. Thai students are very very shy. I even pulled a Bueller. You know how it goes, "Anyone, anyone, Bueller, anyone?" I giggled on the inside at that one.

Not only do I teach Thai students, but apparently I teach stray animals and birds too. They sure like to show up to class anyway. The windows are open, so sometimes a bird will fly in and do a lap around the room then exit through the door. When I was passing out papers to the students I almost stepped on a dog. Yeah. A dog. I tried not to look surprised that there was a dog sleeping on the floor in my classroom! Talk about a zoo. The day an elephant comes in I'll have to put in a complaint.

There were too many funny things that the students said - I can't remember them all now. I'll try to keep a notebook in class and discreetly write them down as they happen. They are all really sweet though. I love their matching uniforms and how they try to individualize themselves with fancy shoes or shorter skirts or shiny belt buckles or spiked hair. I had the students ask me questions and when someone asked if I was married, I said "No. Are you married?" They laughed for about five minutes. I think the joke was on me though. The whole 'Mia is the Thai word for wife' thing. Those little stinkers. I just thought of that now.

This is going to be fun, I just know it.

First Day of School

When I was a kid, every year my mom would take a picture of me on my first day of school right before the bus picked me up. Man, I used to be a fashion icon. Flower dresses, white socks with lace and black dress shoes, teased bangs and headbands, the works. Well mom, I took a picture before heading to my first class. Just for you. It is that same excitement for the first day of school. I love it. Even though it's not autumn and the trees aren't turning colors and I haven't seen a "back-to-school" sale at any of the markets, I was still excited. I may not have the same getup, but I did take a red bus to school. It made me nervous because at least 5 red truck taxis stopped for me but vigorously shook their head and drove away when I said Mor Chor (local lingo for CMU). I didn't know getting a cab to the University at 7am would be such an ordeal. I don't know why they drive off, so I just wait for the next one....then the next one....

The campus is beautiful. It's so green and filled with trees that you can't even see half the buildings. You might as well be walking through a forest. I love it. Here's something that I just noticed today. They let the trees grow in the parking lots. I should say they don't cut the trees down when paving the parking lots. What's that? You found a killer parking spot right next to the entrance? Oh sorry, the tree's already got it. Also, there is a great little patio area outside of the English Department building, and if you look closely in the photo, there is a tree swing! You know I'll hit that up later.

I only teach one class on Mondays and Thursdays. I teach four classes on Tuesdays and Fridays. There is no class on Wednesdays. I don't know how I'm going to handle being in front of students for 5 or more hours two days of the week. Should be interesting. I'll either need to bring a change of clothes or just stop sweating altogether. Oh yeah, there is no air conditioning in the classrooms. I think I'll have to get one of those personal fans that you hold in front of your face and it sprays a gentle mist to cool you down. "Class, does anyone know what a 'soccer mom' is?"

Speaking of class, the classroom is old school. Overhead projector. Chalk board. Tape player. Wooden desks. Did I say no air conditioning? I got there early this morning to scope it out. Seeing all the desks crammed together made me a little nervous when I imagined 40 sets of eyes on me. When class started, the students came inside the classroom huddled in a little cluster, as if their hands and legs were tied together and they had to move as one. Before they actually entered the room, they stopped outside the door until I looked up at them. They all bowed and smiled and stood there. I gave them a nod and a smile and I said 'come in.' They shuffled into the first two rows of desks. In America, students like to waltz in and take a seat at the back of the room like they own the place. It's so different here. They just stare and smile. They were so nervous. The thing that I was nervous about: would they understand a word I was about to say?

I started class right at 8am, and I only had about 11 students. I was expecting 30 or more. For these freshman, it was their very first class of their college career and here they had this girl with a Minnesotan accent who talks too fast. I tried my very hardest to speak slowly and clearly. You try speaking to a group for an hour or more while articulating every letter you speak and only saying two words per second. It's difficult to keep that slow pace. I went through the course syllabus quickly, as well as general classroom expectations, how they can get a hold of me, and other housekeeping things in the first 30 minutes. This was supposed to take most of the class. What was I going to do now? I had 45 minutes to fill. So I had them introduce themselves to me, and after doing so I had a better idea of their skill levels. I then told them a little bit about myself and about America and Minnesota. When I said the temperature can get around -5 degrees Celsius, they just about pissed themselves. (This is a modest 23 degrees F). None of them have ever seen snow, and none of them have ever owned a pair of mittens.

I had the students ask me questions if they had any. The first one was my age. This is what I was afraid of. I'm not much older than them and I want them to take me seriously even though I may only be 3 years their senior. I told them anyway. They all gasped. "22? Did she say 22?!" They thought I was nearly 30. Nice.

The next question was interesting: "Who are you going to vote for in the upcoming election? Democratic or Republican?" I have a feeling he's going to be an advanced student. This was the same student when we did a class exercise about what their favorite subject is, answered, "Studying English with Ajaan Mia!" Oh boy.

At the end of class, I had a young woman approach me and ask me what she needed to do to get an A in the class. It was very sweet and that's when I realized I'm going to have a great group of students who really want to do well. I'm so excited, I can't even tell you. I was exhausted after just one class, so tomorrow I'll be treating myself to some ice cream and a massage at the end of the day. 4 classes.....I'll let you know how they go.

Arabic Dancing and Other Exercise

I had a good workout routine going in the states. Here it's a little different. I hear there is a fitness center on campus with a pool, etc., but I have yet to find it. In Minnesota it's so great to see people out and about on a nice day walking, running, biking, rollerblading, or playing outdoor sports. I haven't seen any outdoor activities like that here. Since I don't have a bicycle yet, I've been going out for a run every morning. It's a good excuse to get up early to beat the heat. Imagine going for a run in mid-August at about noon on a hot and humid sunny day. There you have my 6am run. It's that hot. I slept in this morning and went out at 10am and I had to cut short because it was too much. I've had to cut my run distance in half because it's so intense. Thankfully the weather will only get cooler from here, and the hot season was two months ago.

Maybe there is a reason why the Thai don't run or do other outdoor exercise besides the heat. The city isn't really set up for it. Minneapolis is so lucky to have those lakes and trails everywhere, so please take advantage of it if you don't already. Here is my routine: I turn on the air conditioning full blast before I head out and I run in a straight line down Huay Kaew road for about a mile or so, then turn around and run back in a straight line. It's actually a pretty good spot to run because I don't have to cross too many intersections on that side. I do have to stay alert though. There are potholes, loose bricks in the sidewalk, stray dogs napping under the bus stop shelters, motorbikes using the sidewalks, and manhole coverings that may or may not shift if you step on them. It's like super mario brothers and I'm mario. (I was a hell of a Mario for Halloween, and Lisa was a hell of a Luigi.) I then come home and climb the flights of stairs to my apartment on the top floor and air conditioning, guzzling water and a cold shower never felt so good.

I get a lot of funny looks while I'm running. Turning heads from motorbike riders and tuk-tuk drivers, all probably thinking, "what in the world is that farang girl running from?" I even get some comments from locals hanging out at restaurants when they see me run by, then they see me running by again a few minutes later in the other direction. "Running girl!" they say. I would run on campus where there are more trails and a small lake, but I hear the dogs chase after you, so I'd rather not risk it.

I've heard about this amazing thing they call Arabic Dancing, but I have yet to witness it with my own eyes. I hear it's all the rage here. Apparently they dress up in neon colored spandex/polyester blend outfits and dance their little hearts out. When I do see it, I will hopefully have my camera. Actually scratch that. I hope I have a neon leotard to put on and join them in the fun. It's not the Arabic dancing that you probably imagine, and that's because it has nothing to do with belly dancing originating from the middle east. They just don't pronounce 'aerobic' like we do.